“You ruined the best day of my life” and other things….

It’s not quite 8 am and those were the LOVERLY words the destroyer yelled at me while standing in her undies flinging her long hair out of  her face.  No need to go into details, let’s just say, every mother should start her day knowing she is a “best day ever” ruiner.  It makes you feel all fuzzy and warm on the inside.  Moving on…..

I know you are DYING to know if I actually cleaned out the fridge….2 b honest, I was back and forth on the whole thing.  On the one hand, I was still a little miffed at the big guy for being so judgmental {I know it was all in my head but still} but on the other hand, I took a look and it was pretty disgusting in there.  So I decided to make a compromise.  Isn’t that what marriage is all about anyway?  I decided to clean out the refrigerator……….door.  Bet you didn’t see that coming!  It was gross.  Now it is all nice and sparkly.  A few suggestions if you choose to take on this challenge:

1. Get the kids OUT of the house.
2. If they are NOT fighting and alive leave them be {see photos}
3. Take pictures b/c you won’t believe the difference
4. Swallow your pride and post the before and after shots.  Other people are just as gross as you are, they just don’t admit it. {see photos}
5.  Don’t take too long or the destroyer will do this {see photos}

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I am on my way out to visit my grandparents and get supplies for my DIY for this weekend.  I have decided to make a coffee filter wreath.  Yup, you read that right.  I have to get to the dollar store for coffee filters and to AC Moore for a glue gun and I am all set.  A little excited to get to this.  I am also almost finished my to do list.  It is a little crazy right now but by Monday everything should be ready to go.

It’s only a little after 10AM.  I still have plenty of time to turn this day around…….no pressure or anything but it can only go up from here right?

TTYL,

Col

Ok seriously, did you really think I was going to clean the fridge?

You must not know me very well at all, no worries, that will change over the next 98 days together.  I wanted to take a before and after shot of the fridge (same shot, just 2 pics) but as soon as I got the camera (I was alone btw) and pushed the power button (note to self, buy a camera that powers up SILENTLY) children appeared out of the woodwork.  Now, prior to getting the camera, I was doing dishes.  Known fact, dishes repel small children and husbands, they actually attract mother-in-laws but that’s  a whole other story.  Anyway…..

They wanted to take pics, asked why I was taking pictures in the kitchen, did I break or burn anything and should they call Daddy (I’m raising a bunch of squealers)?  I could just see this playing out…I would tell the kids I was going to surprise Daddy but cleaning out the fridge.  I’d take the pics.  I’d start.  Yesterday would repeat itself (see yesterday’s post) and when the big guy came home the kids would take him by the hand to show him the big surprise.  When they tell him I spent the whole day cleaning out the fridge, he’d shake his head.  See here’s the problem…he thinks I am a terrible cleaner (among a laundry list of other things) and would think I actually attempted to clean the fridge and this WAS my finished product.

Well I am terribly upset with him.  I refuse to be judged for my cleaning when I hardly had time after getting the kids to and from the doctor’s office in one piece.  So in protest, I called a girlfriend and had her and the kids over for a slumber party / movie afternoon.  MUCH more fun than cleaning the fridge and I was able to calm down in time to forgive the big guy judging me before her got home (you’re welcome dear).

As for what I was able to accomplish so far:

1. Running on the treadmill 3 days in a row.  I have moved from having the EMT’s w/ oxygen machine next to me  on the treadmill to simply on standby.  They seem thankful not to have to watch anymore.
2. Got all 4 kids back and forth to the doctor alive.  We had a small scene in the office waiting room involving me asking how much longer (we were in the waiting room for 30 minutes and arrived, as requested, 15 minutes early) while Itty Bitty decided to projectile vomit across the room.  The destroyer and the princess were in hysterics and the little guy told the receptionist it wouldn’t have happened if we didn’t have to wait so long.  I don’t think she was amused, I however treated all the kids to ice cream for being on my side.
3. Went to the dentist ~ now most would not be SO excited to go, but this was the first time I was alone for any length of time sans kids (even Itty Bitty).  Had 2 cavities filled, was told I brush too hard and need a mouth guard b/c I grind my teeth.  Pile that on top of the hearing aids I am saving up for, the glasses I need to have replaced and the braces the dentist recommended b/4 I left, I have to say I will be a vision in my old age…..at least the big guy won’t have to worry about trying for #5.  He’d have to go blind first.  Still a great day!  (see how I can stay positive in spite of all odds: Rocky theme song playing in my head)
4. Found a few Pintrest ideas and can’t seem to boil it down to just 1.  Here’s a few ideas I have.

still working on deciding what to do, but at least I am working towards it.

Today I will be:

1. Seriously, cleaning the fridge.  I promise, I am taking b/4 and after pics as soon as I am done with this post.
2. Cleaning the house ~ we are still unpacking from vacation and hopefully purging as well.
3. showering ~ seriously I stink from my morning workout.

TTYL,

Col

The kids have a plan to destroy me.

This is IT!  I am SOOOO over not getting anything done.  I try desperately to clean, organize and avoid getting puked on (seriously, you have no idea, I have moved from a small burp cloth to a full-blown oversized towel and this kid still finds a way to avoid it at all costs) and yet, at the end of the day, I have repeatedly told my husband ~ he should just be happy we are all alive.

The kids have a plan to destroy me…..ok maybe that’s a bit strong, let’s say I am pretty sure there is a nightly meeting of the minds in the baby’s room.  I envision them with clipboards, flashlights and army men reviewing their plan of attack during the 4 hours I get to sleep every night.  I try to catch them in the act but every time I get up they are all fake sleeping in their beds.  The big guy (my husband) calls me paranoid, I think I am going to install a nanny cam in Mr. TD bear and prove him wrong.  The kids ~ The Little Guy (7YO), The Princess (5YO), The Destroyer (3YO) and Itty Bitty (7 months).

Case in point….it is EXTREMELY early, I got up early to workout (first day and all) and get this started (the blog idea) and so far I have been interrupted to do the following:

1. Give the destroyer a shower (@5:30AM, she states she is sick and this would make her feel better and coughs for effect, I think this one got the AM shift)
2. Choose an outfit that is Ok for the destroyer to wear.  IE this means, a summer floral dress, soccer socks to the knee, dress up heels and enough accessories to make Mr. T proud
3. Asked to decide if I like Peekachu better than Strawberry Shortcake b/c the destroyer does and wants my opinion
4. Asked to supply the destroyer and the princess with grapes b/c they are STARVING (it is not quite 6 AM)
5.  The little guys asks to listen to my iPod Shuffle
6. The princess asks to join in and listen to the iPod Shuffle
7. The princess re-enters upset b/c the little guy will not allow her to listen to the shuffle in the ear she wants, and she does not feel “comfortable” (she actually did the air quotes)  using her other ear for the music
8. The little guy enters and clearly states his case that he is only following the letters on the earphones and he is using the R (right) so she will have to use the L (left).  When I asked if it really mattered I was told, “Obviously mom!  Why else would they take all the time to label the ear phones….maybe her head will explode if she uses it the wrong way.”
9. The princess begins to cry b/c she didn’t want to tell me but she actually did use them the wrong way but just for a little bit
10. The destroyer re-enters with Peekachu singing and asking the little guy and the princess for their thoughts

I have finally had enough and read the kids the beginning of the blog, they laugh out loud and the little guys says, ” Mom all you had to do was ask for some privacy.”  and with that they are out of the office.  SERIOUSLY!?

I don’t want to be mean, but I’ve decided that Itty bitty is my favorite today (the only child who has not interrupted me so far).  Not that it’s a contest, I’m just sayin…

Ok so where was I….see I can’t even remember what the point of the blog post was…and that’s the problem.  I can’t seem to finish a thought, or get anything done here.  Here are my issues:

1. The house is always a mess, I can’t seem to keep up
2. We are not organized ( I think I need a professional here STAT!)
3. The kitchen scares me (So far this year I’ve set the fire alarms off while heating up a frozen pizza and melting a teapot on the stove while boiling water ~ Don’t you dare judge me!)
4. I am overweight, which is HYSTERICAL…you know b/c of #3, you would think since I can’t use the oven or the stove this wouldn’t be an issue….I’m an overachiever
5. I’ve started redecorating the house…..you know b/c I have 1-4 under control!
6. I have no idea how to accomplish any of the above…..I am usually paralyzed with indecision…that or when things start to get hard I get pregnant, either one you decide

Ok so here’s my plan, I am going to create a list of things I want to accomplish in the next 100 days.  Some are big things (go on a date with the big guy ~ seriously, it has been a l-o-n-g time) and some small things (avoid puke for an entire day) but at the end of the 100 days, I hope to be able to finish the list and feel like this year of my life didn’t just pass me by and I was able to get something DONE ~ and the blog will be PROOF for future generations that years ago, I actually got something done, in case there is ever a question.

I’ll write the list later (you know when they nap…pause for hysterical laughter) but for now my goals for today are:

1. Get everyone to the doctor’s office and back without killing anyone (Itty bitty has an appointment so we all have to go, should be fun.)
2. Work out (I already did this but didn’t want to brag with it being #1) ~ struggled to almost died doing 2 miles in the treadmill…see #4
3. Clean out the fridge…I am pretty sure the big guy will fall over when he gets home if I do this…..maybe I’ll get the nanny cam for this, possible funniest home video submission…no one says you can’t get organized and earn $ at the same time see #3 and #2
4. Go on Pintrest ~ terrible addiction, I love it the big guy is hoping there will be some sort of patch I can wear to wean myself off but until then ~ and find a project to do….Ok let’s face it finding a project is not the problem, it’s doing the project….REVISED….find a project that can be completed this week……no pressure or anything.

Ok wish me luck……I’m a bit terrified…..

Colleen